If you’re like me, you tend to find yourself wandering through the kitchen aisle at your local dollar store, giggling at the plethora of pervertables that you see for sale. Perhaps you wonder if it’s safe to use these things in or on someone’s body. If you haven’t wondered this yet, I sure hope that this post will inspire you to start, because there are so many delightful goodies that you can find!
As a general rule, I’d advise against inserting anything from a dollar store into your body as it can be hard sometimes to verify what the materials are. If you’re shopping from a more reputable store (such as William Sonoma or Kitchen Stuff Plus), or recognize the dollar store brand to be a good one (my Dollarama stocks Betty Crocker, for instance), you don’t need to be as careful – materials that are kitchen-safe such as sealed wood, stone, stainless steel, hard plastic, glass, pure silicone, aluminum, acrylic, and ceramic are all genital-safe as well! However, some dollar stores do sell knock-offs or low-quality items, so exercise extreme caution if you are hoping to use anything inside of you.
That said, you can definitely use purchases to hit people! There are so many items for sale that can pack a punch, slap, or sting, depending on what you’d like. Again, keep the source in mind when you’re picking out items. Some may be made to a poorer quality, and thus easier to break under high pressure and force. Start gently, work your way up, and make sure to give your toys a thorough examination when you’re cleaning them.
Without further ado, here are my five favourite items to pick up from the dollar store (in no particular order):
A shoe horn
A wooden cooking spoon
A rolling pin
A cutting board/serving plate
A fly swatter
I once picked up a long, wooden shoe horn for $2.50. Due to the shape of the shoe horn, you can strike someone with the concave or the convex side in order to give the sub two different impact sensations, depending on their preferences.
These come in wood, plastic, or metal! Some have a spring built into the shaft so a bit of extra oomf.
Use this on the butt, thighs, or chest.
You can use the handle or the spoon in order to cause different feelings for the submissive. Different thicknesses of the spoon will impact how thuddy versus stingy the spoon feels, and using the convex vs concave side will also change the sensation.
Use this on the butt, thighs, chest, or genitals.
Rolling pins become thuddy! My favourites are marble, but wooden rolling pins are also quite nice. They have a hard impact that feels akin to a punch, and are likened to batons. If you like intense, deep sensations, getting spanked by a marble rolling pin is absolutely divine. I owned an absolutely exquisite one a few years before I discovered impact play, and traded it away because I never actually used it in the kitchen. I regularly think back and mentally kick myself for parting with it!
Note: you are more likely to find a wooden rolling pin than a marble one when shopping at the average dollar store. I have seen marble ones in some stores here, thus why I included it on the list, but they are harder to come by.
Use this on butts or thighs.
These can be heavy or light, depending on the materials used, thickness and shape of the board, therefore the impact can be anywhere from a light sting to a heavy thud.
Use this on butts or thighs.
Just think of all the jokes you can make about hitting bugs as you use this to torment your lover! Only play with fly swatters that have not been used on insects (I hope this is a given, but I’m putting it out there just in case). These are likely to be the first item on this list to break.
Use this on butts, thighs, chests, or genitals.
What are your favourite pervertables? Let me know in the comments below! Curious what other ways you can express your kink without spending much money? Check out my how-to on kink wall displays!
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