When it comes to sex, power is often my favourite thing. It doesn’t matter if I’m the one with it or not; the ways in which power and control can be used during sex is extremely fascinating and hot to me.
Discovering sex toys opened up a whole range of new options – not just toys that are designed for kink, but more traditional “sex” toys as well. With a bit of thought, almost anything can be wielded for power play, almost anything can be used for kink, and finding those scenarios is almost as fun to me as the actual execution.
One of the first times I tied my boyfriend up, I used the replica of his cock to get me off. He was in chastity, watching me suck “his” cock and then ride it, unable to touch either of us no matter how much he wanted to, and he wasn’t able to get off even though I was. It’s the tease and denial that I love about it – him not quite getting what he wants, but loving the show, wanting more, getting pent up because of it; even more-so because the dildo he’s seeing me use is so close to his own dick.
It was a fun little game of torture that inspired many more scene ideas for years – most of which I’ve had the chance to act on, but not all.
For starters, I have never used a Fleshlight!
While my preference in general tends to be toward less realistic sex toys (as you can see from my collection), there’s definitely something to be said about the ones that are hyper-realistic, especially ones modeled after your actual bodies. I’ve used a number of different strokers, but Fleshlights in particular play upon a very specific fantasy I have, inspired by my long-ago use of my boyfriend’s replica cock: using a Fleshlight (preferably one of the clone-a-pussy ones) on my submissive; edging them, making them beg for release.
Or they’re blindfolded, two of us taking turns using the stroker, making them guess who was controlling it, rewarding them when they’re right, punishing them otherwise.
It’s the realism that makes these fantasies fun, too.
To me, there’s a big difference between edging someone with a masturbator like the Hot Octopus Pulse (a personal favourite of mine) and doing the same with a Fleshlight designed after a vagina or an anus – both are really fun, but the Fleshlight allows for an additional kink edge – “I COULD let you fuck my pussy…but I don’t think you’ve earned that yet. No, I think you’ll just have to fuck this Fleshlight instead, and beg for me to let you cum”.