I have never been a fantasy dick kind of guy. I mean, I love strange, non-realistic toys like my SQURM, but that really isn’t a fantasy toy. I have marveled over Lunabelle‘s very impressive collection, but then I’ve felt how soft they are and have thought “hmm, I don’t think this is for me”. I’ve lusted after some horse and puppy cocks, but never gone through with a purchase, as I never thought I’d actually like it as much as I liked the thought of it.
I’ve still wanted to TRY, though.
With that curiosity in mind, I eagerly accepted the Elephant Trunk (Small) by Exotic Erotics (sent to me by the Center for Sexual Pleasure and Health back when I interned there), then Exotic Erotics also sent me their Wraith (medium), and then Betty’s Toy Box also included a Unicorn Horn (medium) from Split Peaches.
With these three new fantasy toys in my grasp, I went to testing, eager to see how they held up to what I was expecting of them.
The Elephant Trunk
Okay, let’s start with this one.
The Elephant Trunk has a lot of small texture on it, which made me think that maybe this wouldn’t be right for me, but the girth isn’t too intense so I figured it could be okay. The nose portion immediately struck me as something that would make both lube distribution and cleanup a bit of a pain (especially for anal use).
Luckily, the texture was actually imperceivable inside my vagina, which is great as textures aren’t my favourite thing ever.
I like the length and the girth is close to perfect, though I personally would enjoy it more if it was a smooth taper from the head instead of being more hour-glass shaped.
Upon insertion, the head creates quite the popping sensation on my pubic bone, which I hate. Once the head is entirely in, it feels fine – not good, not bad, just neutral. Angling the head so that it’s hitting my g-spot or away from it doesn’t make a difference in my experience of the toy.
Later tests were done on my lover’s butt and he had the exact same experience as I did with the Elephant Trunk, with the added feeling of being extra-uncomfortable with the scoop of the nose (even though we were using a condom over the toy).
How do I use this toy most often? Strapped on to a harness, my lover on his knees, and me hitting him in the face with it in front of an audience. Because I find that hilarious.
The colours are so fucking pretty! I ordered this one in the custom colour-pattern of antique gold and antique bronze, and I’m so happy with how it turned out. Such a beautiful piece of art!
It is a soft silicone, which turns out I really like for a toy of this girth! It is definitely the largest toy that I own, by far – the closest contender being the Tantus’ Cush 02), and the squishiness of the silicone really helps me get the Wraith inside of me.
I was a bit intimidated by this toy, due to the girth, but when I finally got around to testing it, I was pleasantly surprised by my ability to take it. Warm-up wasn’t nearly as lengthy as I expected it to be, and taking it made me feel like a champ! Look at my goddamned vagina and its ability to take big things! Look at how impressive I am (size queens everywhere are laughing at me bragging about this toy haha)!
The bumped ridge around the head pisses me right off, though. It hurts going in, but when it’s coming out post-orgasm, it is awful. It feels SO bad. I haaaaaate it. Once the ridges are fully in, I don’t notice them at all until I start to remove the toy again.
I loved the feeling of fullness that this toy gave me, and (again) how impressive I felt that I was able to take it. It felt really nice when I squeezed my muscles around the Wraith, and when I added a vibrator to my clit, orgasms came preeeeeetty quick. And then I’d remove the toy and I hated it again.
Used anally on my lover, he once again had the exact same experience as me. He likes size a bit more than me, but not by much (my favourite size is somewhere from the Harmony to Leo, depending on the day, whereas his is the Cush 02). He loved the feeling of fullness, was shocked by how easily he could take it, but the bumped ridge felt awful and intense on him, too.
I had a feeling that for someone who does like size, the ridges would be much less of a problem than it was for us, so I eagerly brought the Wraith with me to the fisting party (#Fistmas) that SugarCunt and I threw at Woodhull as one of Sugar’s warmup toys. They like girth – obviously, seeing as they were the center of attention at a fisting party – and like to make jokes about how their vagina is a Tardis.
For them, the ridges weren’t even slightly noticeable. Not only were they not bothered by the bumps, they didn’t even feel them. They completely loved this toy, and the only reason they asked to stop using the toy was because they are greedy and eager and wanted my fist instead.
Would recommend this to someone who likes girth, not to girth newbies. If you’re new to girth, even the small textures feel much bigger as your body is stretching even further to accommodate them.
This toy, while not for me, is a great start to my collection for the fisting bottoms in my life. Which y’all know I am always thrilled to have around!
The Unicorn Horn
The slow taper in girth reminds me of my Pure Pop by Hole Punch Toys, except built to a larger scale, and it feels great! The twisted texture on the Unicorn Horn doesn’t feel as prominent as the ones on the Tantus Twist do, meaning that it’s a more comfortable experience for me when I insert or remove the dildo – in fact, I don’t even notice the texture unless I’m rotating the dildo in me while inserting it.
I love the way this colour pattern work because it is great for making sure you don’t put too much of the toy in people – if they can only take the girth until a certain point, the colours act as a very simple tool to ensure that you don’t put more into them, even when you’re thrusting quickly! Personally, I can only take until the end of the orange section (5 inches), so I know that I’ll be using that as a way to make sure lovers aren’t hurting me when fucking me with the Horn.
The silicone is fairly firm; unlike the Wraith, there is not a lot of give to the Unicorn Horn when you’re using it. How straight it is means that it doesn’t hit my gspot (or a prostate, if that’s what your anatomy consists of), but based on the fullness of it inside me, this doesn’t really bother me.
I like the Wraith more in terms of how it feels to jerk off with it, but because of how the Wraith’s ridges feel, I prefer the Unicorn Horn.
Used anally on several folks, I have gotten the whole toy inside them! Yay for people who can take more than I can!
Honestly, none of these dildos were right for me. They were all fine in that I was able to get off with them without much trouble (when using my PalmPower or my Touch), but I just wasn’t overly excited about the feeling of any of them in me.
Perhaps the Unicorn Horn and Wraith small may have been better fits and made me want them in me more, but to be entirely honest, I wanted the size up so that I could have them for other people, not for me. And the Elephant Trunk is just the greatest, even if I haven’t found someone who enjoys it in them, yet.
What are my next steps for fantasy toys and my vagina? I don’t know! The Mech and Hippocampus interest me the most, though the Pheonix and Bishop also seem up my alley. Or maybe I’ll head over and use Luna’s collection to help me pick!
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