Note: This review was edited on June 6, 2016, to add more information about porous sex toys and what that means.
As you probably know, I love foreskin. I love it on penises. I love it on toys. I love doing silly things to them. I love doing sexy things with them. Basically, I am a big fan of foreskin, regardless what manifestation it takes. So when I first saw the Uncut Emperor on Betty’s Toy Box‘s website, you had better bet I was super excited about it.
This toy HAS A FORESKIN. AND THAT FORESKIN MOVES.
What?!
I cannot fully describe how thrilled I was about this.
Also there are balls, veins, and a suction base, which are also great. But let’s be real: I wanted it because the. foreskin. moves. The end.
Being a Pure Skin toy, it is fairly lifelike in texture. Very minimal smell, no taste, a bit sticky. It is very porous* so between this and the fact that, y’know, the foreskin moves, you have to be extra-careful when cleaning – porous toys can only be cleaned on the surface, but the pores it has cannot be cleaned and, with time, these pores will gather mold, bacteria, and/or fungus. This obviously is not a good thing. I would advise against using it both anally and vaginally because of this – you CANNOT fully clean it. It breaks down over time – as you can see in the picture on the right, the underside of the foreskin on mine already has a small tear and I have barely used it. Lilly (from the blog Dangerous Lilly) has done some great research into why you should not use latex condoms with porous toys, which I urge you to go check out!
*(BTB’s website has this warning “this toy is made from TPR/TPE which is highly porous. It is important to clean after every use and do not transfer this toy between partners or from anal to vaginal play without using a condom”. I really like that they are so upfront about that.)
The suction base works great – it sticks to most surfaces and stayed put. The balls are sizeable and firm, not very flexible. The shaft has a firm core in it so it has some flex to it but it is still firm enough that it doesn’t flop all over the place.
The first couple inches, where the foreskin is, is extra-squishy which is nice when you’re first inserting it (think dual-density silicone). It is 6.75″ long and 5.5″ in girth so it’s sizeable without being overwhelming, depending on your preferences.
I only tested the Uncut Emperor vaginally and was instantly fond of it. The veins add a nice hint of texture to it and if you angle it so the balls are facing your bellybutton instead of your butt, the balls can feel nice rubbing against your clit. This may not work if you don’t have an enlarged clit like I do (thank you, testosterone!), but it worked for me! With a vibrator (We Vibe’s Tango) or a butt plug (We Vibe’s Dusk) my orgasms came…really quick. Like disappointingly quick. Like didn’t even have time to enjoy the dildo quick. Don’t get me wrong, the orgasms were good, just shockingly fast. For me personally, I have learned that in order to fully appreciate this toy, I need to use the dildo without any other toys for a bit first. The Uncut Emperor is currently the largest in my collection so it really fills me up, making the orgasms happen a lot faster. If you’re used to larger toys, this one probably won’t give you the same instantaneous feeling of being close to cumming.
Once it was in, the foreskin didn’t do anything other than add a bit more give to the head of the dildo but I don’t even care, I love that it’s there. Knowing it’s there even though it doesn’t make a big difference to the feeling of the toy…that still made me like the toy even more.
Note on storage:
This is one part I hate about the toy. Try to make sure the Uncut Emperor is lying flat, not bent or have the balls weigh down one side, or….it will become bent out of shape. Then you’ll be forced to figure out some creative way of storing it so that it’s bent in the other direction and therefore will bend back. It is possible to bend it back, but it’s a huge pain in the ass.
Recommended for:
People who like realistic dildos, large balls, being able to ride a dildo instead of thrusting with your hand, those who like a bit of size to your toys, those who like foreskin, those who want a toy just for them, those who can’t afford a toy made out of a safe material at this point, and/or those who are looking to test if you like the size/feel before investing in something silicone.
Buy if from Betty’s Toy Box!
