October Spotlight: Dildo or DilDon’t

The monthly spotlight is a feature that takes place on the second (sometimes third) Monday of every month and is designed to highlight a blog, vlog, or podcast that is under a year old. There will occasionally be other folks featured here as well, such as porn companies or artists, but the main focus is to highlight new people within the sex education community. If you’d like to be featured, please reach out!

Dildo or DilDon’t (Blog)

For those who don’t know Carly, AKA the Queen of Wands, she has been a sex educator at the Pleasure Chest on and off since 2010, and she now has a site of her own – complete with one of the absolute best titles in the industry, in my opinion! She describes herself on twitter as being a “Professional Pervert. Total Nerd. Sex Blogger. Queer, Poly, WOC. Just here glorifying obesity”, and that’s a pretty good summation of what you can expect to find on her site.

Dildo or Dildon’t is divided into several sections; “Witch Bitch“, “Personal Posts” (ranging from body positivity to sex work to sex toys), porn and sex toy reviews, “sex worker advice“, and a heck of a lot of sex tips. I like what she has to say about what sex is (hint: it doesn’t need to be penis going in hole!), as well as her piece on being nice to cam people (the article is gendered for cam girls, but applies to cam folks of all genders!). I’m debating trying my hands at some public camming again, and this piece is helping to inspire me!

Her site has technically been around longer than a year, but it became active in January 2017, so I’m counting it in the “under a year old” category anyway, as that’s when Dildo or DilDon’t really took off.

You can find Carly on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, or on her website.

What do you love about Carly’s work? Let me know in the comments below!


Want to get featured? Contact me! I love discovering new people and helping to promote new, talented folk (for free)!

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